Plaque Avoidance Tactics

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Plaque Avoidance Tactics ~

Plaque Avoidance Tactics, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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It hadn't registered with me that sidewalks could be 'smoking' until I realised that some aren't, as it were.

As an avid collector of sightings of unusual little blue Paris plaques, imagine my delight, then, when a friend told me about this, or indeed these cute beauties, because there are in fact four of them clustered around a school. This is a bit of in indictment on today's French society; I doubt that they are aimed at unthinking smouldering passers by who might cruelly pervert our innocent angels from the path of limpid-lunged righteousness.

NEW! Paris Photo Chronicles Vol.10 just out...

I'd say more French teenagers smoke than in the rest of Europe put together; so much for health education in collèges and lycées, not to mention FACs, eh?

The jury's still out as to whether I can include them in a future Top Ten Blue Paris Plaques feature, as I doubt they're exactly ancient, but I don't see why not; they're blue (and green), plaques, in Paris and authentic enough. I'm surprised more schools haven't taken up the initiative, although enforcing the edict would seem a bit ambitious. After all, pavements are public property and we're not yet New Yorkified enough here to have irritated shop assistants shouting at passers by to stop polluting their working environment; quite the opposite is the case, of course.

Innocent pedestrians now have to negotiate the first and second hand fumes of a thousand bored and skiving office workers any time they walk down a Parisian trottoir ever since the introduction of the seriously flawed prohibition on smoking in enclosed public spaces, thereby rendering every so-called 'open' café and restaurant terrace practically unbearable for fresh air breathers.

Oops, didn't mean to be a whinging pom, sorry about that. I'll get back to my virtual blue Paris plaque collection and anoraks and stamp albums and tooth brushes (there's some kinds of plaque I do try to avoid) and see you in July!

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Tomorrow Never Knows

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Tomorrow Never Knows ~

Tomorrow Never Knows, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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Waiting until tomorrow can sometimes seem to be the best, or the worst, thing to do, depending on your outlook on life and what it is you're considering putting off.

Postponing an unpleasant task, such as doing your homework or writing that onerous report is something I'm a qualified and experienced specialist in.

Today's consumer-driven, instant gratification society, on the other hand, would have us believe that waiting until tomorrow to make that 'essential' purchase is absolutely the last thing we should do. And what's more we don't need to - check out this handy credit option we've devised just for you at such an attractive rate...

Economists have a principle known as 'maximising satisfaction'. The problem is in deciding at just what point our satisfaction will be maximised by the purchace of that new smart phone, say. The problem is, we know that the Apple iPhone 5 will be better than the version 4S, and possibly better than the Samsung Galaxy III, but this means waiting, and that wait can sometimes seem interminable and insufferable.

Another problem is that the iPhone 5 isn't the end of the line. The version 6 will surely be better still, increasing our satisfaction once again. Later.

This works all over the place in all aspects of our lives. If we skip a holiday this year, next year's could be amazing with twice the money to put into it. With twice the satisfaction? Maybe, but is the opportunity cost of a miserable staycation this year worth it?

What about drinking that special bottle you've been saving for just such an occasion. And yet could you accept the nagging feeling that it would have been just that much better next year if you'd waited?

Donating to charity now would save lives. And yet waiting a while, investing the money, and donating more later would save more (other) lives. Those you didn't save this year will be dead, of course. Like empty bottles of vintage Bordeau waiting to be carted away and recycled like any other receptacle of cheap plonk.

I replaced my camera yesterday. I couldn't wait. I'd weighed all the odds, balanced the pros and cons, and it seemed to me that my satisfaction would be fairly high by doing so. And I got it on zero percent credit terms, exceptionally, as a valued customer of the FNAC store here in Paris. Instant gratification, or what?!

Of course, next year will bring an even better model. It's always the way. And yet if we continually waited for the best we'd never buy anything and where would the economy, not to mention all our hobbies, passions and productivity be if we didn't actually have any equipment to perform them with? We might as well be dead. Which we will be eventually, of course, as Keynes reminded us.

There. It's 7:07 on a brand new shiny Friday morning and I've already written another Paris chronicle. Highly satisfying, I can tell you. Which leaves me with the whole day to get on busily with putting off all manner of unpleasant chores until the weekend (or later) and of course regretting the fact that I should probably have waited for next year's Nikon - I've just seen a rumour report saying it's going to be awesome...

(Now, should I succumb to the terrible urge I have to publish immediately, or can I wait until this afternoon when the States are awake and I get twice as many hits... darn it, will this thing never end..?)

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Waiting For Springtime

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Waiting For Springtime ~

Waiting For Springtime, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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Despite the wierd incrustation which resulted from my messing around with double exposures trying to make a straightforward image less so, we're in fact looking at a pretty normal fountain.

Normal for 1719, that is, when this square 'neo-classical' ediface was installed and even run commercially from 1774 to 1782 to supply precious drinking water to the thirsty populace.

We can't see any of that here though, just this marvelous Zeus-like head of a chap with what looks like a miniature drainpipe in his mouth not doing much at all. So much for free drinking water for all, eh?

Then again, it is a huge waste to have water simply, and literally, pouring down the drain, as is the case at the two-spouted wall-mounted version on the corner of Rue du Faubourg Saint-Antoine and Rue de Charonne just up the road.

Someone's decided, no doubt unofficially, to spruce up Zeus, as it were, with a lick of almost metalic red or coppery paint, and the effects rather fetching, it has to be said. As for the spearmint gum coloured eyes, well I guess that's just a question of taste, or perhaps tastelessness, like once you've chewed it over for a few minutes, but I'll go with it.

I have an article on all this (you'd never have guessed, would you?) talking about the Petite-Halle fountain, which waffles on about pilasters and capitals, cornices and pediments, not to mention a crowning acroterion and a couple of niche-bound spigots, yes, I kid you not.

However, whereof one cannot speak (not having a clue about all that stuff), thereof one should keep one's big mouth shut, I'll leave you with this strange image of a god with a drainpipe in his gob waiting for water or why not Godot, whichever you prefer.

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

What A Load Of Rubbish

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ What A Load Of Rubbish ~

What A Load Of Rubbish, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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What a load of rubbish, you might be thinking, if you're not a fan of street culture. And you wouldn't be far wrong.

It is indeed a load of Rubbish. Rubbish the graffiti artist, that is to say. He's one, along with Fred le Chevalier and Diamant, who are becoming more and more a part of the Parisian street art landscape at the moment.

This was taken on an abortive stroll around the 11th arrondissement of Paris; an area with a lot to offer but much of it sneakily hidden away behind digicode doors, especially on Sundays (the day of our walk, naturally).

The incessant and worsening drizzle didn't help our experience, and after a couple of desperate detours by a church where the enigmatic Louis XVII (wha.. who?) may or may not have been buried as the 'infant from the Temple dungeon', and the graffiti you see above, we hit a welcome cafe and called it a day.

Which was a shame as there are countless passages and hidden courtyards to explore when the weather and the day is right.

Never mind all that, these graffiti guys are starting to awaken the artist's itch which makes me want to get out there and start sticking myself. You can see here and here that I'm getting some stuff ready, just waiting for the right moment to strike...

Until then, which I'll surely share with you, I'll leave you with half a guy and a drainpipe, and more than enough information to find him for yourself if you feel so inclined.

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Go With The Flow

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Go With The Flow ~

Go With The Flow, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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They apparently think we're all half blind, but I'm not criticising efforts to make metro directions as clear as possible.

These big new panels are part of an overhaul of the signaling system (for humans) and are quite effective and dare I say it attractive.

Turning left leads to Vincennes, but what about right? OK, we're at Nation where line six terminates but you'd have thought they could still have told us that Charles de Gaulle Etoile was our final destination.

And then there's another anomaly. Why is the number and the 'M' slightly off-centre so it spills over the edge? I bet they paid some firm hundreds of thousands of euro to come up with that idea.

Maybe it's about completeness. Our brain likes things to be complete and is bugged when they're not. The circle's not complete so it attracts our attention and we are more likely to notice the sign. That's my theory.

But maybe it goes deeper. I read about a world-famous violinist who played one of the most complicated pieces ever written in the New York metro for 45 minutes during rush hour. About three people stopped to listen. He made thirty two bucks. Places at his sold out concert the night before cost $100. His violin was worth $3.5m.

Moral of the story? Our appreciation of beauty depends, to a great extent, on context. So back to my metro panels, perhaps we're looking at a piece of graphic design magic, and simply don't have the background or culture to appreciate those off-centre numbers, letters and circles. Another theory, which I'm quite happy to consider.

Further moral: I didn't have a story for this picture until I started typing... and thinking, and letting my thoughts go where they wanted. Which is a good argument for starting, just starting, and the rest will come. For whatever it's worth. $3.5m maybe!

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

In My Mum's Garden

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ In My Mum's Garden ~

In My Mum's Garden, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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Little poem for ya about just the other day in the Paris metro in rush hour when, utterly unexpected to meself and any one who knows me, right out of the blue I happened to look up and...

Caught myself coming

Through pulses of people

Like waves of wisteria

In my mum's garden

Met myself musing

On stairways of solitude

How much humanity

Gambles on getting in

Got myself going

There's chores to be chewing

Like ants we're all apeing

In my mum's garden

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Wishing Well Whimsy

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Wishing Well Whimsy ~

Wishing Well Whimsy, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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Curious indeed to find such a circular structure inside such a resolutely angular edifice. Be that as it may, this is the way up (or down) the decidedly un-arc-like Arc de Triomphe for mere mortals who haven't got a believable excuse for going up in the lift.

A spiral is no doubt the fastest way skywards, but also the most likely to set your head spinning and I can't help wondering what they've done with the corners they've economised on in such a curveless building.

Moving into another league altogether is the double helix staircase, of which I only know one in a building on one of the corners of the Palais Royal. Others tend to belong to Da Vinci influenced castles in the Loire valley and stuff, so we're fairly honoured to even have one in Paris I guess.

Other famous spiral staircases in Paris include the ones leading you up into the heights of the Notre Dame towers, and of course the sublime structure you see on all the ads for the Gustave Moreau museum in all its powder-pink glory. The Eiffel's staircases are classically rectangular as a rule, those going up the legs at least.

Which brings me full circle back to the last spiral staircase I've climbed, which you can see above, with that tiny circle of light at the bottom and the desperate arm clutching to the banister for support. I often wonder if it would be possible to jump right down the middle without getting caught up in the railings and battered to hell before, admittedly, smashing to a gruesome death on the ground below. I have no need to find out from first hand experience though, so don't worry about me. I'm much more of the contemplative type, and twirling steps give me plenty of that for now.

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Poo-Brains, We Salute You

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Poo-Brains, We Salute You ~

Poo-Brains, We Salute You, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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One of the most enjoyable aspects of wandering the streets of Paris is the utter unpredictability of it all. You never, and I mean NEVER know what you're going to come across on any given jaunt, but you are almost guaranteed there'll be something, the only question being what.

Here was one of the day's surprises: an entire cavalry regiment calmly striding stately down the Quai de Montebello, the way you do, if you will.

My first thought was that they were headed to the Esplanade des Invalides to welcome some visiting dignitary, as often happens. It was only later that I realised it was almost certainly to do with the honouring of the war dead to which the new President Hollande had graciously invited the old President Sarkozy.

I bet they don't get fines if they crap in the middle of the boulevard, the hippocrites. And one horse dump must be worth about 50 pooch poops if you ask me. I've seen horses with poo pouches attached to their behinds, but I guess that would be about as elegant on these magnificent beasts as us humans walking around with incontinence bags dangling proudly from our belts.

Where is this going? Oh yes. Anyway, a great sight to behold and a worthy member of my Paris surprises series. And another one should be coming right around the corner any time now. (Skidding on huge piles of pony poo, if they´re unlucky, he mutturd...)

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Ghosts In The Wind

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Ghosts In The Wind ~

Ghosts In The Wind, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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Meet Emmanuel. A bell. Not just any bell, you understand. A 13 ton monster which is rung to mark certain ceremonies and on significant occasions. Such as the Liberation of Paris in the 2nd World War, or the day after the 11th September, 2001 following the attacks on New York's Twin Towers.

Climbing the south tower, as anyone may do, allows you to get up close and personal with Emmanuel, although not when he's ringing, obviously. 13 tons is a lot of bell, and it comes from the thickness of the walls - a good armful of metal - and don't bother trying to swing the bell yourself. You might as well piss in a violin (classic and charming French idiom, for your edification) for all the good it would do.

'Being Quasimodo' is probably the number one tourist activity in the bell chamber itself, along with taking pictures of said faux-hunchback and making grinny little 'V' signs if you're Japanese, of course.

Getting to see Emmanuel isn't the easiest of endeavours, and we ended up waiting for ages to squeeze through the one-at-a-time passage way (for both directions) in order to get our chance to live out Hugo's dream...

Luckily, the hidden little square between the two bell towers is replete with mythical beasts - chimera if you will - for all tastes and lenses, from the quite literal - elephants and pelicans - to others which simply defy description and which you will see something of if you follow this blog assiduously. Not that you can miss them.

Emmanuel tolls in a resounding E-flat, and his timbre is eerie and evocative, to say the least. Videos exist of his voice if you care to investigate further, and I suggest you do. After all, describing a bell without hearing it would be like talking about painting without seeing it. My violin metaphor is serving me well today...

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Reasons To Be Cheerful: Paris

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Reasons To Be Cheerful: Paris ~

Reasons To Be Cheerful: Paris, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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You can't begin to imagine how pleasant it is to distort and destroy the 'original' colours of images taken only to be told how awful and 'artificial' and cheap and nasty they look by the haters.

There are others who quite like them, and that's the whole point: it's not really about 'pleasing' others, as such; it's about having fun and trying something different from time to time.

The complaint that my latest mindwarp has simply been achieved by using the newest such 'n' such application and that anyone could have done it seems about as valid as someone complaining that Renoir's or Van Gogh's or Picasso's efforts are banal simply because they used the latest type of paint available to them at the time. Or Rodin experimenting with a new chisel or type of sandpaper, I dunno.

Not that, in reality, many people moan. People, quite rightly, have far better things to do with their time, and if they haven't, more fool them.

This shot delights me... I'm not sure why, so I'll leave the explanation at: because I'm delighted by it. Maybe it's because of the way the appalling Montparnasse tower doesn't seem quite so appalling as it neatly splits both the top frame and the colour effect in two. Or maybe it's because I like the way the grass is all scuffed up, colour and texturewise by whatever app I used. Perhaps it's the way the grungy frame at the top looks like smoke pouring out of the aforementioned tower-cum-chimney griming putrid pollution down the sides of the photo. But maybe it's just because it's still cool to be on the Eiffel Tower after all these years. Yes, that's probably it.

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Montmartre Memories

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Montmartre Memories ~

Montmartre Memories, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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This is the charming family I spent three full days with, going up, down, in and out of practically every major Parisian attraction you can imagine. And we walked. Oh boy, did we walk!

Rare is it that I'll publish such a people-y picture, but seeing as it's extremely 'artistic', which no-one could deny, n'est-ce pas, I thought I could get away with it.

Of course it's the Place du Tertre, up in Montmartre in the 18th, and we were lucky to stumble upon a marvellous artist who did great justice to the folks right at the end of the day, just before the light started to fade.

I always enjoy comparing the sitter to the sketch. Sometimes you wince and wonder what the client's going to think of the final result. No such worries in this case - they were all delighted with the result, which is good, as this was one of the most important planned events of the whole trip, so I'm relieved it wasn't a disappointment.

Have I ever had a portrait of myself done? Nope, not unless you count a scrawled biro brouillon in a pub by someone once which took about a minute and a half but was vaguely me-like I suppose.

Maybe I'll get this guy to do me, but then again I probably won't. I much prefer playing around with my own image and seeing what monstrocities I can come up with. Go here or here if you don't believe me... and besides, what if I didn't look any good... and what would I do with the thing anyway..?!

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.

Pale Against The Clicks

Paris iPhone Photo Chronicles ~ Pale Against The Clicks ~

Pale Against The Clicks, originally uploaded by Paris Set Me Free.

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The first time this distressed dame appeared on Paris & I was way back in the early days of 2010, when I had her complaining about the colour of the fire extinguisher - it's funny looking back on it now...

This time I offer you a full frontal, and we can marvel at the emotion which can be drawn from simple stone.

I can never quite comprehend how there never seems to have been a single false chisel stroke which accidentally removed a finger or the tip of a nose. It's not as though you can just start over as though you were screwing up a sheet of A4 and sulkily aiming it at the bin. We're talking months of work here.

Oh well, not my problem. I think this was originally stuck to the side of the Arc de Triomphe. I can't say for sure, but she's now inside at the top of a fearsome flight of stairs and others of a very similar ilk now decorate the outside, looking down wearing expressions of varying degrees of scariness and agression, befitting Napoleon's greatest victory arch.

These days she hasn't got much else to do but rail at tourists who take her picture without even asking permission and then write nonsense about her. Tough is the life of the fallen vixen warrior indeed.

And why not...

J è  GRAB MY 20 AMAZING PARIS CURIOSITIES FREE NOW!  ç J

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© 2012 Sab Will / Paris Set Me Free - Contact me directly for photo tours, interviews, exhibitions, etc.