iPhone Photo Chronicles
~ Cheeky Little Red ~
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i was reading a book the other day which was saying that the myth that surrounds the consumption of the highly addictive and toxic poison alcohol is the biggest confidence trick ever pulled on mankind, with the funniest part being that we're playing the trick on ourselves.
The idea, says the book, that alcohol makes our lives immeasurably better or richer or more fulfilling is as ridiculous as the idea of installing an alcohol gland right next to the thyroid; don't we think that evolution would have thought of that, if it were so good?
All the fancy packaging, and happy, loving moments as seen in soft-focus ads are nothing more than marketing spin to stop us realising, or help us to forget that we are addicted to a powerful and deadly drug. And this even if we just drink a tiny bit, because the substance in and of itself, produced from the rancid by-products of rotten grape juice or other gone-off substances is pure evil to our bodies, which know this (ever puked or had a hangover?), the book tells us. Alcohol consumption doesn't have clear steps - it's a slippery slope, we're told.
An entire joke industry and profession has even been created with so-called 'experts' telling us which version of our favourite poison will go best with our favourite food, using highly scientific words and phrases to describe these noxious drugs: 'Naive, and yet... chubby. No, hold on: it's a naughty little wine that should be taken around the corner and spanked!' Except that if you do go around the corner you might meet the happy souls who have chosen to live under the bridge with their lover the bottle, or uncle Jack who touches the girls and hits his wife when he's under the influence but it's ok because he's dying slowly and painfully from liver disease like tens of thousands of others. Says the book.
Luckily, here in France, capital of alcohol mythology and legend, we know all of this is just nonsense, and anyway we can drive quickly under the bridges, just hoping we don't get stuck at the lights. Santé!
(A Paris iPhone street photograph by Sab Will for the 'Paris and I' photo blog)
1 comment:
In case you're interested, here are some more hilarious attemtps to convince others (and oneself) we actually have a clue what we're talking about when sipping... ___________________________________
From a winey website that doesn't take itself too seriously:
"It's a naive domestic burgundy without any breeding, but I think you'll be amused by its presumption."
So reads the caption to a classic cartoon by James Thurber. And he had every right to poke fun at people who get a little too carried away with their wine tasting comments. Wine lovers have pretty much developed their own language over the years.
Describing some of the more evasive qualities of the wine can be quite a challenge. And let's face it, trying to imaginatively characterize some hard-to-pin-down aspect of the wine is one of the joys of writing a wine review. Here is a small sampling of wine comments of from our own tastings:
"Canned metallic overtones" (a sauvignon blanc)
"Tart -- unfortunately not like the woman, more like the green apple" (a gewurztraminer)
compared to "Robitussin DM" or medicine by multiple reviewers (a cabernet sauvignon)
"Bubblegum overtones, vinegar hightones" (a merlot)
"Bland, yet dishonest; virginal, yet tarty... vacuous, non-triggering, grudging; evolves into gingerbread" (a pinot noir)
"boof" and "boofless" coined to described wine character (syrah and shiraz)
"A 'De Gaulle' wine: with an earthy nose, tall but slightly dead" (a zinfandel)
Of course, it helps it you don't drink too much of the wine before noting you impressions. It serves little purpose if your comments make no sense:
"Amusing peptides. Hints of the Crimea." (a red table wine)
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